Welcome to a special spring edition of La Stranezza’s Fabulously F***ed Up Imaginarium Fun Time! Today–ahem, Today (that’s better) we’re going to talk about a subject rather close to my heart: Jungian psychology. Except for, not really, because I can’t think of any good jokes based on Jung’s name except for maybe a parody of Rod Stewart’s rendition of Bob Dylan’s “Forever Young”, in which I substitute the word “young” for “Jung”. So instead we’re going to talk about flowers!
Flowers. I don’t know why I emboldened that word. Anyway, this is the first thing I have to say about flowers: That Georgia O’Keefe sure makes some far out pictures of them. They almost look like…well, human flowers. I dunno know what you call them. I’m not a pc thug. I hate the taste of pina coladas. Long story short, though, then the nun says: “well, excuse me for asking!” and in this case the nun was Carrie Fischer.
This is the second thing I have to say about flowers: they’re rather pretty, wouldn’t you agree? I actually have a joke about flowers smelling pretty that you should here…Once upon a time, in Kansas, there was this nun who liked to play the bajo sexto all the time, because her convent had one of the best Mariachi bands in the region, and one day she broke a string so went out into a field to pick some flowers. Then something happened, and the nun says: “well, excuse me for asking!” and in this case…Oh, damn, I already said that, didn’t I? Quick! To Paragraph No. 4 and beyond!
Here is my third thing about flowers: I’ve always wanted to create a cannon to fire a bunch of flowers at my enemies so bees would come up and sting them to death, like in that movie I told you I would tell you nothing about. By always, I mean since ten seconds ago when I started this paragraph. (I’m a fast typist.) I’m going to go do that, but first I have to say something completely irrelevant for no reason. There, that should work.